we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
