it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize
