just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
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