I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Randomize
