he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
Randomize
