You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
