I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
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