BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
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