well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
I understand Curling. That high.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
Randomize
