Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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