I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
Randomize
