giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
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