hotel room ftw
Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
Randomize
