In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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