May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
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