you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
Randomize