so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Why did my mother make you get naked?
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
Randomize
