I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize