Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
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