Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
