but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Randomize