I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Randomize
