I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
Randomize
