I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
