So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
Please come collect your inebriated significant other. He just sleep-farted and scared my cats. Please hurry.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
Randomize