Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
