this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
it was like eating out sand paper
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Randomize
