I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
Randomize
