My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
Randomize
