pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Randomize
