Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
