So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
Randomize
