He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
he told me I talked like a deaf person
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
i black out too much to be "responsible"
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize
