So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
