im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
Randomize