It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Randomize
