with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
Randomize
