Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
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