My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
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