oh god the rape fog is back!
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
