But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize