god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
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