I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
I woke up under a house in Key West
Randomize
