we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
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