I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
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