You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
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