just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
