Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
40s are totally the cure
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Randomize
