it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
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