how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize