Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
PANTIES FOUND
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
Randomize