All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
Randomize
